Five Finger Death Punch bassist Chris Kael admitted he relapsed with alcohol about a year ago during the coronavirus pandemic.
Over the past four years, Chris has led a sober lifestyle, saying he feels stronger than he ever does after coming out of rehab.
During a recent interview with “The Rockman Power Hour” he said he relapsed with alcohol during the coronavirus lockdown.
He said: “I got sober February 3rd, 2018. Were it not for a mishap during the pandemic, which I haven’t spoken publicly about until today, a mishap over the pandemic, it would have been four years sober. But right now I think I am… I have to go back and look at the date, honestly.”
He continued: “I remember I went to a concert and I was trying to do… I was, like, ‘All right. I fell off the wagon. I’ve been back on the wagon. I’m going in. I’m gonna try to control drinking this time. I’m gonna allow myself to have two. And if I do two, cool.’ Nope. Did three. Haven’t had a drink since. I said, ‘I can’t do it.’ Even trying to limit myself to two, I couldn’t do that.”
Asked if having three drinks was the reason for the relapse, Kael said: “No, no. It was much worse before that. August of 2020, post-breakup, post-being in a house by myself, it was not good. So as I turned to not wanting to feel for a little while… Now, I’m back to it again — I’m doing my meetings, doing all the stuff, working with my sponsor, working the steps and all that stuff now.”
Chris said he tried to get sober a few years before going into rehab. “I was trying to do it on my own — and I’d been vocal about, ‘Yup. I gave it up. I did this. I did an interview with Dean Delray and I was talking about it. A short time thereafter, I was out on the road and I caught a case of the f*ckits with whatever I was going through at that point — overdramatizing everything ’cause that’s what I liked to do back in the day. Now I’m much more centered, much more focused. But I had just poured a drink and I was walking off the bus and a fan came running up to me: ‘Kael, I wanna thank you. You going sober made me think about myself going sober.’ And there I am standing with a f*cking drink in my hand. ‘Yeah, man. I’m just doing what I can to help out.’ And I felt like such garbage.
He continued: “So it was important for me, for my own accountability, to be vocal about it. ‘Cause I’m a people pleaser — I wanna make people happy; I don’t want people to be disappointed in me — so, in the beginning, it was very important for me to be vocal about it so that others would know and I kind of have that babysitter collectively around the world watching. I’m much better at self-accountability and not needing other people to have their eye on me.
He added: “I think I’m out from under that rock at this point. But collectively, we do the groups, we do our meetings — all kinds of stuff. So I still have that support system — even tighter support system. My God, during the pandemic, I did more meetings in Zoom than I ever did before the pandemic. Obviously, COVID was awful, but if you look for the silver lining to things, you can turn a negative into a positive if you just clear your mind, look around and take a full scope of what’s going on and just really continue to do the right thing.”