Thursday, October 2, 2014

Former Slipknot drummer Joey Jordison stated he was fired from Slipknot via a Singing Telegram

Following the statements of Jim Root that Stone Sour fired him by phone (click here to read the news), former Slipknot drummer Joey Jordison has revealed an even more shocking tale to MetalSucks:

“I was sitting in my living room playing Skyrim, when there was a knock at my door. I wasn’t expecting anyone, so I was like, ‘Who could that be?’. I opened the door to find a guy in what looked like an old-fashioned elevator boy outfit. He did a little jig and started to sing this horrible song letting me know I’d been let go from the group.”

Joey Jordison has also shared a copy of the text of the Singing Telegram:

I am your singing telegram
Sent to you this December
To let you know you’re not a member
Of our band anymore
So don’t get hit by the door
On your way out
It’s no use to cry and shout
You were once one of The Nine
But without you we’ll be fine
“What will ‘Knot be without me?”
Well we’ll tell you and you’ll see
We’ve already hired a Jew
To take the drum spot away from you
No, this message ain’t in jest
Yes, we wish you all the best!
We just don’t want you with us
When we get back on the bus
Please don’t try to beg or barter
Now you have more time for Scar the Martyr!
Yaaaaaayyyyy Joey!!!
P.S. In case it wasn’t clear, you’re fired.

Obviously, this is a joke.